In a word, wow!
This article was so powerfully articulated, so excellently expressive, and written in such a way that I could feel the unbearable weight of the invalidation and rejection that has been cast upon you and so many others who are simply trying their best to manage their lives and their condition while having to constantly justify their very existence in a fallen world which has normalized systemic lies and the brutality of those who show remorseless indifference to the suffering of others – the very definition of being treated inhumanely.
When you were writing about getting your haircut, you wrote the following:
"I knew that I won’t be taken seriously as the man that I am, and also not seen and respected for who I am, not for the false persona that was forced onto me at birth."
I can guarantee you this: I for one take you very seriously and accept you fully as the man that you are and someone I am very proud of for having the courage and the persistence to push forward while dealing with such a heavy burden.
The only people you need in your life are those who want you in theirs, when you have nothing else to offer but yourself.
To those that think that they can invalidate, dehumanize, or dismiss you and walk on past, tell them this:
“You are not the first, nor will you be the last to walk on past, for there is nothing you can do, nor is there anything that you can say that I have not already sustained. Knock me down, and knock me down again, and each time you will see me rise to a level you will never ever gain."
Do not let their words hurt, for they are the perp, and allow no space in your head that they are allowed to rent.
Never doubt yourself. I offer you these words of inspiration from the great Spoken Word Artist and Mathematician, Harry Baker:
After all - you are wonderful.
Right now this feels like everything.
Right now it always is.
It’s only afterwards that we can see there’s more than this.
You can be informed by this without being formed by this. Just as there is a calm before the storm, there is dark before the dawn in this.
Whoever told you you must shrink to fit in got their filter wrong.
We are not sculptures to be chipped away but platforms to be built upon, so if somehow this changes you, let it be a resilience in knowing that you made it through.
Do not give them an inkling of a thicker skin.
If we stop listening, how can the truth that permeates start sinking in?
Not every day’s a battle.
Not every part of life’s a war.
It is the times that lie between that need to be worth fighting for.
So, remember what this moment is.
You may not have chosen this, but one day you will be someone who rose from this.
If you see the same in others, you can notice this, so show them this: There's no eclipse without some kind of glow in it.
Those that know you, love to know you
Those that love you, know to love you.
Those that don’t? They forfeit the right to get to be the ones that mold you, and if you ever meet the old you, say "I come from what you go through."
There will be times when that is all you have to hold to.
There will be days you cannot help but cry and days you cry for help.
There will be days that you cannot resist or are too tired to rebel.
When it takes everything you've got to not just be defined by someone else, you can start by showing kindness to yourself.
Lastly, remember, it doesn't matter who hurt you or broke you. It only matters who made you smile again. :-)